All the movies to stream instead of going on that great vacation
There’s a whole lot of content online right now about all the super fun free (or very cheap) things we can all do this summer if we’re too broke for a vacation. Girlboss, the Sophia Amoruso lifestyle website for ladies who boss (or whatever, we’re not sure), has offered up 50 very depressing alternatives to having a great and fulfilling summer with suggestions including:
- play a game of frisbee in the park
- visit a family member or loved one
- listen to a podcast while you explore a new neighborhood
- or write letters/postcards using that stationery you’ve had for ages – presumably so you can scribble down a hasty SOS to all your bastard friends who had the money to go on vacation without you.
Whether you’re simply busy working this whole summer or just don’t have the money to get away, here are twenty movies you can stream online that will make you remember that vacations are for fucking losers and you’re a total champion who can have a great time on his or her own. Okay?! Good. We hope you have a lot of cheap wine ready.
20. The Descent (2005): YouTube TV, Philo, Tubi, The Roku Channel
Can’t see any downside to that girl's trip you’re missing out on? Watch Neil Marshall’s cavernous horror about a girls trip gone horribly wrong and you’ll probably feel like your apartment is a fucking Hilton penthouse suite by the end of it.
19. The Ritual (2017): Netflix
Like The Descent, David Bruckner’s British horror will only make you feel glad for every hiking trip you’ve had to turn down this summer. Particularly if said trip is in the middle of the Scandinavian wilderness and surrounded by the forests of an ancient evil entity, because fuck that.
18. 47 Meters Down (2017): Tubi
It’s classified as being a “thriller”, but with the right perspective this film is a total comedy. Particularly as it’s about two sisters on vacation in Mexico who go diving in shark-infested waters only for their protective cage to break away from their boat, leaving them at the bottom of the ocean with barely any oxygen. Guess who isn’t going to plummet to the bottom of a shark-infested ocean anytime soon? That’s right – you! Party on!
17. Mamma Mia (2008): Peacock, Starz, Amazon Prime Video
There are things in this world far worse than not going on vacation. Two of those things are Pierce Brosnan’s (The World’s End) questionable singing ability and the perma-smug grin Dominic Cooper (Preacher) boasts throughout this entire movie. Enjoy some perspective with a little help from Abba!
16. Moonrise Kingdom (2012): Fawesome
Let Wes Anderson remind you of the joys of your childhood! Build a blanket fort! Relive a time in your life when hitting up the local park was an adventure in itself! And then get horrifically drunk as you mourn your lost youth and inevitably destroy your blanket fort in a fit of wasted confusion.
15. Love (2015): Fandango at Home
Because masturbation is a vacation for your genitals, and Gaspar Noé’s incredibly NSFW erotic drama will do the job under the pretense that you’re still doing something deeply “cultured”.
14. Cruel Intentions (1999): Hulu, Amazon Prime Video
If you don’t give a shit about looking cultured, there’s always the preposterous jerk-off bait of Sarah Michelle Gellar (Buffy the Vampire Slayer) and Selma Blair (Hellboy) making out in this 90s trashterpiece to return to for two minutes of desperate joy.
13. Marie Antoinette (2006): Hulu, BritBox, Criterion Channel, Disney+
Just think about all the millions of pastel-shaded cakes and towering wigs you could buy instead of going on vacation! Sofia Coppola (Lost in Translation) and Kirsten Dunst’s (Fargo) historical movie will also help remind you that it’s super classy to just stay home and eat a shit ton of cake – even if you don’t live in the Palace of Versailles and get murdered by the locals at the end of it all.
12. Battle Royale (2000): YouTube TV, Tubi, The CW
If you need an unhealthy dose of nihilism to make it through this summer without a sweet-ass getaway, why not watch a class of Japanese school children tear each other apart on a small island?
11. Ibiza (2018): Netflix
Just remember that Gillian Jacobs (Community) and the rest of the Ibiza team didn’t even get to go to the Spanish island to make the damn film. You’re not the only one getting bamboozled by life on this whole travel vibe.
10. Deep Blue Sea (1999): Starz Apple TV Channel
Give yourself extra points if you have a parrot and can pretend you’re LL Cool J, but otherwise just sit back and enjoy the fact you’re nowhere near a single DNA-altered shark that could eat you like they devour that terrible CGI-rendering of Samuel L. Jackson (Pulp Fiction).
9. Friday the 13th (1980): Paramount+, fuboTV, YouTube TV, MGM+
See? Camp sucks! At home, you can enjoy all the pre-marital sex, drugs, and hooch you want without the threat of a psycho killer or his psycho mom coming along to disembowel you for it.
8. Paranormal Activity (2007): Paramount+, fuboTV, YouTube TV
Spark up a phat one, turn out the lights, and watch Oren Peli’s found-footage horror on your own for a fun reminder that your home can feel as instantly strange and uninhabitable as a bad Airbnb pad. All with the help of some blazed paranoia, jump scares, and the mysterious unsolved noises of your own home.
7. Coherence (2013): Amazon Prime Video, Peacock, Philo, YouTube TV, Tubi
James Ward Byrkit’s trippy sci-fi mystery will make you freak out about whether you’re even in the reality you were born into or if you’re somehow vacationing in a paradoxical alternate reality without realizing it – and you haven’t even been wearing your fave vacay hat this whole time!
6. 10 Cloverfield Lane (2016): Amazon Prime Video
Because look on the bright side: You might not be going on vacation this year, but at least you’re not being forced to hideout from potential monsters in an underground bunker owned by a madman (John Goodman) while plotting ways that your badass self (Mary Elizabeth Winstead) can escape. Just sayin’.
5. The Crow (1994): Kanopy, Hoopla
Because if you’re not going on vacation this year, you may as well either reinstate your teenage goth phase or enjoy one for the first time. Paint your face like sweet baby angel Brandon Lee and mope about in a uniform black ensemble while brooding about the world and saying, “It can’t rain all the time,” even though it’s 107 degrees outside and it hasn’t rained in months.
4. The Witch (2015): Netflix, YouTube TV, The Roku Channel
Just so you can pause the final scenes and provide heartfelt responses to Black Phillip’s satanic wedding vows with an enthusiastic “Yass, Satan!” when he asks things like “Wouldst thou like to live deliciously?” and “Wouldst thou like to see the world?” Yass, Black Phillip! Yass! Take us now!!
3. Inside Llewyn Davis (2013): Kanopy, Hoopla
Set in the Greenwich Village folk scene of the early 60s, the Coen Brothers’ movie is basically like every trip to whatever hipster hellhole your friends were intent on dragging you to halfway across the world but in the comfort of your own home. Plus – Adam Driver (Girls) and Oscar Isaac (Ex Machina)! Quite the view.
2. Bone Tomahawk (2015): Hulu, AMC+, Shudder, Philo, Pluto TV
You might not be going anywhere fancy this year, but at least if you manage to watch every second of brutality offered by S. Craig Zahler’s Bone Tomahawk you’ll be able to tell people that you’ve “seen some shit” that they wouldn’t believe this summer – and mean it.
1. Piranha (2010): Paramount+, fuboTV, YouTube TV, Fawesome
If you’re feeling especially bitter about all of your friends being away on vacation for the summer, you can ease your sorrows by watching a bunch of beautiful young people get ripped to shreds by piranhas while on Spring Break. It stars Adam Scott (Big Little Lies) as some sort of science dude and 90s fave Jerry O’Connell as a porn director whose dick gets bitten off. Vacations suck!
Speak No Evil (2022/2024): A Family Getaway Nightmare
American family accepts weekend invitation from British hosts met on vacation, leading to psychological horror. Stars James McAvoy and Mackenzie Davis; Blumhouse production. The 2024 remake keeps the tension fresh while underscoring why declining that “idyllic” countryside invite might be the smartest move you make all season.
The Rental (2020): Airbnb Paranoia
Two couples rent a coastal house for a weekend that unravels with suspicion and violence. Directed by Dave Franco; explores trust and hidden dangers in short-term rentals. The film lands like a direct extension of the bad-Airbnb dread in Paranormal Activity, only now the house itself feels like the threat.
Midsommar (2019): Daylight Horror in a Foreign Commune
Grieving couple joins friends on a trip to a remote Swedish commune for a midsummer festival. Directed by Ari Aster; known for its unsettling daylight horror and relationship breakdown. The bright, flower-crowned rituals make every sunny group getaway look a little more suspect.
Get Away (2024): Island Family Vacation Chaos
Stars Nick Frost and Aisling Bea as parents whose family getaway turns bloody and twisted. Blends dark humor with survival horror on an isolated island. The latest entry in the subgenre proves that even a quick ferry ride can strand you in primal territory faster than a delayed flight.
Streaming these titles keeps the focus on the screen rather than the suitcase, and the keyword remains stream whether you queue up a classic or a fresh release. The same logic applies across every platform rotation: when the itinerary looks shaky, the couch stays reliable.
