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All the worst movies Meghan Markle ‘acted’ in

Tapping the sepia-tinged memories of the past can be wildly entertaining, especially when the subject is none other than her Royal-Highness-obviously-never-wanna-be, Meghan Markle. Buckle up folks, we are about to embark on a thrilling ride back through the Meghan Markle movies hall of shame. Or, shall we say, her ‘silver screen’ misadventures that make us cheekily question, “Did she really ‘act’ in these?” But hey, a Duchess gotta start somewhere, right?

From princess gowns to courtroom frowns

First up on this Meg-a-thon is the goldmine of a flick, “Remember Me”, where Ms. Markle played a bartender for all of three minutes. The movie, in truth, was a brooding Robert Pattinson angst-fest, but Meghan popped onto the screen and disappeared faster than Harry’s hairline. A duchess in a dingy bar? Now that’s ‘acting’!

Next, let’s wag our fingers at the hustler lawyer Rachel Zane, Meghan’s long-lasting gig on “Suits”. Full of law briefs, high heels, and flirtatious banter, this was the Meghan Markle movies-making moment that put her front and center in middling nighttime drama. Behind those glass office partitions, Meghan smirked, sobbed, and sorted out legal mumbo jumbo in her quintessentially understated style.

But wait, there’s more, the Meghan Markle movie rabbit hole hops to cable movie land with “Dater’s Handbook“, a predictably sweet Hallmark production. This was pure, unadulterated, rom-com Meghan—waffling between sensible and rogue in matters of the heart. Didn’t we all chuckle knowingly at the irony when she told Prince Charming, “I don’t need a prince to have a happy ending?” Little did we know indeed!

An unexpected laugh out loud romp

Now, who would’ve thought that before her regal rendezvous, Meghan was ensuring stray pooches found their forever homes in “Random Encounters”? A low-budget guess-who’s-coming-to-dinner rom-com where Meghan’s heel-wearing, dog-dating ways were allowed to run wild before she became Google’s most Googled woman. And seriously, these Meghan Markle movies are starting to feel like plot prophecies, aren’t they?

And then there was “When Sparks Fly” – ‘fourth-of-July’ fireworks Jell-O shot of a movie, with Meghan glamming up as Amy Peterson, big city journalist who ran back to her hometown, and her high-school ex, for a story. Middleton skirt aside, this Meghan was the real deal – rom-com, sizzle and heart, served with a dollop of saccharine patriotism.

Lastly, let’s not forget the anti-climatic gem “The Boys and Girls Guide to Getting Down”, a pseudo-documentary dealing in dating and recreational substance etiquette. Meghan shin-digging as a party girl, smirking at clubbing quandaries, and even dealing illegal candies. A far cry from her staid regal duties, eh? Well, doesn’t that just top off your Markle movie marathon bingo card? All you royal revelers, dig in!

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From royal rebel to Hollywood’s humble servant

Who knew our not-so-prim-and-proper royal, before becoming famous globally in Meghan Markle movies, used slumming it in Hollywood holding back-end jobs. Not shy to roll her sleeves, Meghan worked as a freelance calligrapher to keep those bills from piling. Just imagine, the Duchess of Sussex was scratching out wedding invites one day, and the next – BAM! She’s goofing off with Patrick J. Adams in the legal drama “Suits”. A true Cinderella journey, right?

It’s easy to poke fun at Meghan’s career pre-prince, but no one can discredit the rise of this independent woman making a name for herself in the notoriously cut-throat film industry. Sure, Meghan’s earlier roles may smack of B-grade cringe, but they also highlight the grit, perseverance, and charm that eventually propelled her to international stardom. It’s Meghan being Meghan, stepping out of the shadow and into the spotlight.

And let’s be real, those ‘Meghan Markle movies’ were her training wheels. Every stilted line delivered, every cheesy smile plastered, it was all building towards her role of a lifetime – an American “princess”. Laughs and smirks aside, Meghan’s Hollywood journey from bit-part obscurity to her ‘Suits’ legacy and eventual royal hustle, makes for a pretty darn compelling narrative. After all, isn’t it all about who has the last laugh?

Crowning glory or royal misfit?

So, whether you’re completely charmed by our Duchess or see her as Tinseltown’s royal oddball, all these Meghan Markle movies are only a popcorn bag away from your binge-watching pleasure. After all, isn’t it fun to watch a princess wrangle stray dogs or spin legal yarns before she began adorning the Buckingham mantle? Because, for better or worse, you gotta hand it to her, Meghan really knows how to ‘suit up’ for any role. Let the Markle movie marathon ensue, folks!

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