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For research: The best stories about Jon Hamm’s penis

His ham. His sausage. His long rod. Whatever you want to call it, the internet cannot get enough of the mystery that is Jon Hamm’s penis. For years, Hamm was not afraid to go commando, and the internet fell in love with every photo of the man’s member bulging against his pants.

In case you managed to forget about this age of the internet, a lawsuit around one specific photo of Jon Hamm and his bulge are giving everyone the chance to revisit this. . .  unique time in internet history.

Back in 2013, photographer Lawrence Schwartzwald was one of many photographers to grab a photo of Hamm’s endowment, but Schewartzwald’s specific photo was used without his permission in a Huffington Post article about the cringiest moments of 2013. Specifically, in the form of a gif with a cleverly placed “image loading” bar over his ham.

Therefore, Schwartzwald sued HuffPo over the photo, claiming their use of the photo without licensing broke copyright law. This brings us to 2020, when the lawsuit was finally settled. On September 10th, Judge Ronnie Abrams ruled that use of the photo didn’t break copyright law. As HuffPo is a news source, news companies have the right to use photos to explain “what the fuss is all about” in certain situations.

Judge Abrams also ruled turning the image into a gif with the “image loading” bar was transformative enough. Nonetheless, the ruling caused the internet to reminisce on the days where the biggest issue was seeing Jon Hamm’s penis. Here are some of the best moments to occur thanks to the Internet’s obsession.

Jon Hamm eats a bull penis to avoid talking about his own

Fans of The Late Late Show with James Cordon are probably familiar with his game “Spill Your Guts or Fill Your Guts”, where guests either confess the dirty secret Cordon asks them or they eat something disgusting. When Jon Hamm appeared on the show in 2018 he played the game alongside Cordon.

Right at the end of the segment, as the table spun around to the bull penis, Cordon asked Hamm to tell the audience how big his “Hammaconda” is by using his hands. After Cordon pestered him, Hamm chose to dig into the bull penis instead of confirming or denying how big his johnson is.

“By the way, as rumors go – not the worst.”

Jon Hamm has made his dissatisfaction about people discussing the size of his pecker loud and clear in the press for years, but a 2016 interview with GQ Australia has Hamm singing a different song about the rumors. 

Hamm acknowledges the craze around his anaconda, though isn’t a fan himself. “It was a topic of fascination for other people, certainly not me.” The bigger shock was how he finally came around to accepting the rumor, after telling people to “F*** off” about it just three years prior in Rolling Stone. “By the way, as rumors go – not the worst.” 

Those words were heard ‘round the world, and the craze around Hamm’s genitals continued. 

The numerous photos from the Mad Men days

AMC didn’t need to spend any money on an advertising campaign for Mad Men. All they needed was Jon Hamm going commando and some paps to gaze their cameras down at his trouser snake. The numerous paparazzi photos from the Mad Men set prove that even Jon Hamm’s penis was getting into character as Don Draper.

The day AMC finally made Jon Hamm wear some underwear

According to New York Daily News, AMC literally had to pay their advertising people extra to try and photoshop Jon Hamm’s dong out of promotional images for Mad Men because it was that distracting.

So it’s no surprise AMC finally put the kibosh on Hamm’s commando behavior in season six of Mad Men. Sadly, there were no more kinky shots of Don Draper packing it hard in his 50s-style pants for fans to drool over. Fear not, as Jon Hamm was still going commando off set. To this day, there is the occasional Jon Hamm penis pap photo when he goes for a walk on a bright & sunny LA day.

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