Inside the Existential Comedy of ‘(Don’t Know) How to Be’
(DON’T KNOW) HOW TO BE — Spanish title (NO SÉ) CÓMO SER — finds its heart where laughter meets existential crisis. The new feature from director Salvador Espinosa (Club de Cuervos, El Vato) and writer-star Tato Alexander (Non Negociable, Can’t Quit Mom) premieres in the U.S. at the Austin Film Festival on October 25 and 29, following its world premiere at the Morelia International Film Festival.
Presented by IDA Films, the 85-minute dramedy unfolds over one evening, as a millennial couple and his boomer parents clash in a house full of expectations, unfinished conversations, and an unforgettable cat named Brad Pitt.
“The movie doesn’t aim to teach, but to spark an honest and funny conversation about how we position ourselves in relation to current issues,” says Espinosa.
When identity meets absurdity
When identity meets absurdityAsked what inspired them to explore the theme of not knowing how to be, Alexander is blunt:
“Precisely that same obsession—and the frustration of feeling like we have to fit in a box.”
The film’s tone dances between discomfort and humor.
Uncover the unexpected now
Uncover the unexpected now“We always knew we wanted to make a funny film,” Espinosa explains, “but for us it was important that you felt a bit uncomfortable as the film went by.”
Building a creative shorthand
Espinosa and Alexander previously teamed up on Guadalupe Reyes, You’ve Got This, and The Dad Quest.
“More than evolving, we keep discovering how aligned we are,” Alexander says. “That’s very important for making a solid creative partnership.”
A theater-born intimacy
The project’s intimacy came from rehearsal.
“We rehearsed like a stage production,” says Espinosa. “The actors really lived the characters on set, shaping very honest performances.”
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The dinner that detonates everything
The dinner scene—where the family’s façade fractures—was always meant as the film’s ignition point.
“That was always the idea,” Espinosa says. “To make that scene a turning point for Majo, and to show the issues bubbling just under the surface.”
On Brad Pitt, the cat
“The cat’s name, Brad Pitt, is meant to symbolize certain Western values,” Alexander laughs. “Its death reminds us that ideals—and what we hold in high regard—are always changing. Not even Brad Pitt is eternal.”
As a comedian, Alexander finds the humor in discomfort.
“Since that’s what I find funny in life, it becomes what I write about.”
Espinosa mirrors that visually:
“As the evening passes, the narrative style gets as chaotic as the characters’ actions.”
Though steeped in Mexican sensibility, its reach is global.
“Even though it’s a very local setup,” says Espinosa, “it’s a universal movie. A lot of people around the world right now feel they don’t know how to be.”
Alexander threads personal truth through every exchange.
“Our identities and romantic relationships are shaped by social and cultural values,” she notes. “Since they’re always changing, generational tension is inevitable.”
Mexican humor: tragedy and laughter intertwined
“Mexico has a very tragic and comic culture,” Espinosa reflects. “We love drama, but we’re also very happy and funny people. Comedy and crisis coexist naturally.”
What they hope we take away
“We’d love for people to walk out questioning the ideas—old or new—that we keep carrying even when they don’t really serve us,” says Alexander. “Hopefully it sparks conversations about who we truly are and what we actually need, instead of just how we’re supposed to think.”
(DON’T KNOW) HOW TO BE is distributed by IDA Films and Filmmaker, starring Tato Alexander, Memo Villegas, Arcelia Ramírez, Gerardo Trejoluna, and Flor Benitez.
